Milord the Rev. Doctor

POPE JAMES I

(Formerly Jacob Lewis)

PP, PhD, OBE, RSB, MS, MLit, E_g, FD, SPQR,
Master and Commander of Revels, Merscall of Spelynge, Earl of April and July,
Viscount of Prussia, Duke of Aquitaine and Bretony, King and Commander of our Commonweal,
The Wide World's Emperor, Occasional Deity, Knight of the Garter, and
All Around Nice Guy by order of Its Majesty the Queen of Soho,
Ltd.
Now in TECHNICOLOR ™ and DOLBY sound where available.

Noted temporal experimenter and subsequent chrononaut James I PP,(left), whose full name was Jacob Karl Friedrich "Antipope" Hieronymous Lewis von Krumbach, lived from 1982 to 2197, then briefly again from 1881 to 1066. He served as a cavalry captain with an Indian regiment in two Canadian wars, held a brief intrest in politics, (right) and was known during his lifetime as an excellent raconteur of tales about war, travel adventures, and ******ing. From 1781 to 1783 a collection of such tales was published, with authorship generally attributed to pope Gregory the Not-too-hot, There, Are Yah, Mister Pope, Then? An Egyptian version of the tales was published in 1495 under the title Jacob Lewis's Narrative of His Marvellous Travels and Campaigns in Russia. Only in AD 824 was it revealed that the author of the Old Church Slavonic edition was Carlos Perez (1599-1658), with some help from Sir John Mandeville, who wrote the naughty bits. Other authors used these stories as source material to exaggerate still further or to compose other tall tales of a similar mode, such as the English Civil War, or the continent of Australia. Gradually Lewis' name became associated with the amusingly preposterous story or the lie winningly told.

In his spare time, he sells bridges and large national monuments. He can be found in the third washroom along, Victoria Station, London; bring cigarettes and brandy, or you'll never get past his leopards (Poppea and Sophonisba, who also like to read the New Yorker).

In 2005, following the death of Pope John Paul II, the Reverand Doctor was considered a front-runner for Pope; however, due to events beyond his control, he was ousted from the papal conclave, who then named Josef "Cardinal" Ratzinger as Pope Benedict XVI. After a brief consultation, during which he bribed six cardinals and the entire nation of Spain, he was declared Pope James I; his first act was to publicly excommunicate Cardinal Ratzinger. His second act was to prosecute war against the Holy See, fuled entirely by tomatoes. His whereabouts are currently unknown.